Northwestern Memorial Hospital: No Vacancy
Yep. No Vacancy. We arrived at 8am this morning to check in. I had three days and nights worth of sexy, yet comfortable hospital fashion and boredom stalling, computer accessories packed. My hands were full. My eyes were wide. And that’s when they told us there would be a 3–5 hour wait for our table.
“Excuse me, what’s that?”
Apparently, air traffic control tried to slide a few too many sickies into the pattern last night. Wouldn’t it work better to inform patients while they are still at home drooling in their own beds, than send out a team of customer service reps once they’ve arrived?
I thought this is how Comcast operated, not Northwestern Hospital.
Yet another day wasted.
And then I mutter, “Ohhhh, I’m gonna Yelp about this. Or maybe I’ll fill out a customer service card. Nice. Better yet, I’ll write a letter. And I’ll take down someone’s name! Yes! And then I’ll ask for their supervisor! I’ll demand a coupon for ½ off my next chemo! Or maybe…maybe I’ll just go home and wait… Unless! Unless I wait it out. Beat them at their own game. Then, maybe my complaint will be grand enough, that Aura and I can get upgraded for free to the Northwestern Valentine Suite! That’s the room where they put pink and red food-coloring in your IV drip, and your nurse dresses up like Cupid.”
A cancer patient can dream, can’t he?
Instead, I demanded a free parking voucher. And I got it. I won. I freaking won.
What is Love? Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me…no more.
